[Micchy is... not wearing his jacket today, even if he really wants to for the sake of reassuring himself. He's dressed decently, at least, and he heads over to the cafe, all of his Pokemon put away. This isn't a conversation for them. It's a conversation just for himself and Rise, and he doesn't want their reassurance or judgement.]
[He looks a little bit tired as he approaches, and sits down across from Rise, smiling a bit. He's spent a while searching for Wrath, but... this needs to be done, too. He orders himself some coffee, and takes a deep breath before he fixes a serious expression on his face.]
... What I'm about to tell you is... going to sound crazy, or confusing. It's also... a very upsetting story... and no matter what you feel about it, it's... fine to feel whatever you feel. Okay?
[She can make the decision as to whether or not she hates him on her own. He... doesn't expect that she'll still be friendly to him... but that's her right.]
[Not being greeted sets Rise on edge. So this was going to be a very serious conversation. Part of her is really glad she hadn't decided to get something to eat. He looked so much more worn down than he did on the video, and the last time she'd seen him in person.
She nods hesitantly.]
R-Right.
[Whatever this was going to be, it might just hurt. She has to be prepared for that.]
My family at home... is fairly high up in Yggdrasill Corporation. My brother is... was, I guess... the head of Research and Development. It... things were good for a while, but... the 'games' that the Beat Riders played with Inves... the Beat Riders were the dance teams in the city. I didn't know it, but Yggdrasill had been encouraging them to use these creatures called Inves to settle disputes. Inves are... think of Pokemon, but initially they were all small and in control.
... They stopped being in control. Cracks started appearing, and Inves started to invade on their own, along with the forest they came from. Some of us got our hands on belts called Drivers, and used Lockseeds to transform into Armored Riders. Lockseeds were what we used to summon Inves, but they could also be put into a Driver to cause a transformation. None of us knew what was going on for a while... but then I found out that Yggdrasill knew what was happening and had been trying to find a solution to save people.
It... wasn't a very good solution. It was to hide a number of people away and give them Drivers so they could survive... and sacrifice everyone else.
[He pauses to take his coffee from the waitress, and to give Rise a moment to process everything he's just said.]
[If it wasn't for the fact that she had seen him in his sentai looking armor... she would have thought that he was talking about some sentai kids show that aired on weekday afternoons when kids get out of school. It's still very hard not to think that way.
But this was Micchy's actual life. Rise felt bad that his life had gone this way. Here she was, a survivor of a kidnapping and a near death at literally her own hands (since the Shadow was her), and he was fighting to save everyone in his own way. A much more productive way than with her.
What was worse is the fact that this world was so much better for him than his home. Was he ever homesick?]
Ah... that sounds awful... did you ever stop the people responsible?
[... He smiles slightly at the question. It's... hard to think of himself as not being partly responsible now, after all.]
From what I've heard... this is just something that happens. A world nears its end, and the Helheim Forest spreads to it. Those that are left fight to possess the Golden Fruit... which is an item that's got near-limitless power. Essentially, whoever has it becomes a god. Once people found that out... a lot of people tried to go after it, to use it either for their own power or to save people.
I didn't. Not directly. The strongest Inves are called Overlords, and they and the Inves are what remains of the previous civilization to be taken over by the forest. When you eat a fruit from the forest, you're changed into one of those. That's... what happened to the previous leader of the team I was on, though we didn't know it until after he'd been killed. But the Overlords... they're not human. Most of them have been fighting for a long time. Some of them... one of them in particular, really... considered us toys. I... allied myself with her.
[This part... this part is the most painful part, and he can feel his resolve breaking. How can he tell her this? ... But he's come this far. He has to push on.]
There was someone on my team... her name was Mai. She was... beautiful, strong-willed, kind, and always was there to help other people. I... I... I fell in love with her, but she didn't feel the same way. I wanted to protect her, to keep her happy, at least, even if I couldn't keep Kouta happy. And if I couldn't keep her happy, I could at least keep her safe. It... was bad. I joined with my brother at Yggdrasill to try to push back the forest, to keep her ignorant of the real danger, even though I thought his plan wouldn't work. I allied myself with that Overlord, thinking that if she could get the Golden Fruit then she'd at least let me have what I thought was 'mine'.
[... He's aware how disturbing that sounds, and he bows his head briefly before continuing. He has to get this all out before he lets her react.]
I've always been taught to not let anything get in the way of my goals, and that the purpose of having power was to help those less fortunate. I thought that if I could keep her safe, then one day she'd thank me. She'd call me a hero, and she'd love me back. ... But that didn't happen. The Golden Fruit was placed inside of her, and... people got in my way. They tried to stop me. My brother got in my way, and I killed him and knocked him into the river. Kouta, our team leader and my best friend tried to knock sense into me, and I killed him, too. And when I got back from that, I'd found that the man I'd left her with had taken the Golden Fruit out of her, and she was dead.
[He scrubs the back of his hand over his eyes, trying to keep himself from crying. It's not going to help him any. Slowly, painfully, he lifts his head so he can look Rise in the eyes.]
... I'm... I'm sorry, Rise-san. I didn't want to tell you... I... I shouldn't have done any of that, but... I did. I didn't want you to hate me. I didn't want you to think I was a bad person, but I am. And... I'm sorry, for as little as that matters.
[This is a lot to take in. Rise has never heard a story like this. To think that a world like this could exist was beyond her. Her own world would look peaceful besides his, except for the whole actual god trying to kill everyone. They all technically died during that fight to keep her Senpai safe.
Hearing him siding with someone who was clearly a bad guy in her mind was not what she expected. He seemed like he had a much better head on his shoulder than that. Rise crosses her arms on the table, leaning forward to relax. It wasn't any use. There was just so much tension in the air.]
.... Micchy...
[She doesn't know what to really say. He caused death, at his own hand and not. To be so delusional, thinking a girl could love him just because of those things. That if he worked hard, he'd be everyone's here and be loved by all. Selfish to boot. It might sound cruel, but maybe it was better for Mai to have died. She wouldn't have to see Micchy as he was now.
Rise knew she wouldn't want to if she was in that girls shoes.
She bites her lip as she looks at him.]
... you're such a kind person... it's really hard to believe any of this happened, especially that you made those things happen. I... I think if I knew this when we first met, I'd be just as scared as I am now. Maybe even more.
... I... I'm sorry, Rise-san. You have every right to be afraid of me. I tried not to lie to you, but... I didn't tell you the truth, either.
I can't... ask you to forgive me. That weekend where people from home showed up... Kouta showed up, and so did my brother. Kouta forgave me... I think my brother tried to, in his way, though... he blamed himself. But I don't deserve to be forgiven for those kinds of things. When I get home... if by some miracle the world manages to survive... I'll still never be able to make up for what I've done.
[It won't do him any good to try to express how he'd gone mad, or how he'd tried to claw his way back from it. It'd just scare her more.]
I don't expect you to try to continue being my friend. I don't expect you to think that I'm okay to continue talking to. If you never want to speak with me again... I'll miss it, but I have no room to complain about it. I really... do want to become a better person, if I have the chance to. I want to help people rather than hurt them. But... I don't know if I can.
[He smiles a bit sadly, and... no. He can't even pretend that he's not tearing up at this point. His voice is a bit shaky, and it takes him a moment to get the next part out.]
I'm... I'm scared of me, too. I can't guarantee that I won't hurt people again. I haven't hurt anyone here, really, but I might. I'm a dangerous and terrible person, even if I don't want to be. So... it's up to you if you ever want to see me again. You can take as much time to think about it as you want.
[Rise could tell at first that he had wanted nothing to do with her, and somehow they became friends. He promised to protect her after she had told him about her past. Even now he was trying to protect her, pushing her away even if Micchy wasn't consciously aware that he was. And if he was doing it conciously, he was doing a good job of hiding that.
This hurt. Much worse than she thought it would. She had never been terrified of a friend before. A little intimidated, like with Kanji, but never to the point where she wanted to run and hide. She moves her hands down to her lap and digs her fingers into the fabric of her skirt. She's got to keep some kind of grip on reality.
The only relief she feels is in not having brought Nanako with her. That would have made everything much, much worse.
She takes a deep breath before forcing herself to look at him.]
I don't... I don't want to stop being friends, but...
[For now she had to rip the band aid off, and heal. Her voice gets smaller when she finished her words.]
I think we should stop talking for a while. So I can... think about all of this. Okay? I don't want to rush a decision... when I'm ready-[if ever]- I'll contact you.
[Rise is on the verge of crying. It takes all of her resolve not to run before he answers her.]
[... It's clear that she needs time, and that him sitting here is just making it worse. He takes another drink of his coffee, before standing up.]
I... thank you, Rise-san.
[For at least a few moments of happiness. For at least a little bit of time together. For not just bolting straight out. He bows to her, a bit lower than he needs to, and then heads towards the counter to pay for both of their drinks.]
[Rise waits for him to leave before she starts crying. This was going to be really rough. Now she feels like she can't come back to Goldenrod without the risk of seeing him again. All she can think of is running away, and she will. Run, fly, just get away.
She'll stick to traveling until she can handle this better.
Standing, Rise watches him go. This was not at all what she had expected. She may never be able to look at him again. Time will tell.]
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carisma_sensei
[text]
Date: 2015-09-04 12:13 am (UTC)[text] >> [action]
Date: 2015-09-04 12:29 am (UTC)[Rise was there before the half an hour was up. It had been a while since she'd seen Micchy, and she was more than just a little worried.
He didn't seem like himself lately.
So here she sits in appropriate fall clothing, with hot tea in front of her, waiting.]
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 12:38 am (UTC)[He looks a little bit tired as he approaches, and sits down across from Rise, smiling a bit. He's spent a while searching for Wrath, but... this needs to be done, too. He orders himself some coffee, and takes a deep breath before he fixes a serious expression on his face.]
... What I'm about to tell you is... going to sound crazy, or confusing. It's also... a very upsetting story... and no matter what you feel about it, it's... fine to feel whatever you feel. Okay?
[She can make the decision as to whether or not she hates him on her own. He... doesn't expect that she'll still be friendly to him... but that's her right.]
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 12:56 am (UTC)She nods hesitantly.]
R-Right.
[Whatever this was going to be, it might just hurt. She has to be prepared for that.]
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 01:43 am (UTC)My family at home... is fairly high up in Yggdrasill Corporation. My brother is... was, I guess... the head of Research and Development. It... things were good for a while, but... the 'games' that the Beat Riders played with Inves... the Beat Riders were the dance teams in the city. I didn't know it, but Yggdrasill had been encouraging them to use these creatures called Inves to settle disputes. Inves are... think of Pokemon, but initially they were all small and in control.
... They stopped being in control. Cracks started appearing, and Inves started to invade on their own, along with the forest they came from. Some of us got our hands on belts called Drivers, and used Lockseeds to transform into Armored Riders. Lockseeds were what we used to summon Inves, but they could also be put into a Driver to cause a transformation. None of us knew what was going on for a while... but then I found out that Yggdrasill knew what was happening and had been trying to find a solution to save people.
It... wasn't a very good solution. It was to hide a number of people away and give them Drivers so they could survive... and sacrifice everyone else.
[He pauses to take his coffee from the waitress, and to give Rise a moment to process everything he's just said.]
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 02:04 am (UTC)But this was Micchy's actual life. Rise felt bad that his life had gone this way. Here she was, a survivor of a kidnapping and a near death at literally her own hands (since the Shadow was her), and he was fighting to save everyone in his own way. A much more productive way than with her.
What was worse is the fact that this world was so much better for him than his home. Was he ever homesick?]
Ah... that sounds awful... did you ever stop the people responsible?
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 02:56 am (UTC)From what I've heard... this is just something that happens. A world nears its end, and the Helheim Forest spreads to it. Those that are left fight to possess the Golden Fruit... which is an item that's got near-limitless power. Essentially, whoever has it becomes a god. Once people found that out... a lot of people tried to go after it, to use it either for their own power or to save people.
I didn't. Not directly. The strongest Inves are called Overlords, and they and the Inves are what remains of the previous civilization to be taken over by the forest. When you eat a fruit from the forest, you're changed into one of those. That's... what happened to the previous leader of the team I was on, though we didn't know it until after he'd been killed. But the Overlords... they're not human. Most of them have been fighting for a long time. Some of them... one of them in particular, really... considered us toys. I... allied myself with her.
[This part... this part is the most painful part, and he can feel his resolve breaking. How can he tell her this? ... But he's come this far. He has to push on.]
There was someone on my team... her name was Mai. She was... beautiful, strong-willed, kind, and always was there to help other people. I... I... I fell in love with her, but she didn't feel the same way. I wanted to protect her, to keep her happy, at least, even if I couldn't keep Kouta happy. And if I couldn't keep her happy, I could at least keep her safe. It... was bad. I joined with my brother at Yggdrasill to try to push back the forest, to keep her ignorant of the real danger, even though I thought his plan wouldn't work. I allied myself with that Overlord, thinking that if she could get the Golden Fruit then she'd at least let me have what I thought was 'mine'.
[... He's aware how disturbing that sounds, and he bows his head briefly before continuing. He has to get this all out before he lets her react.]
I've always been taught to not let anything get in the way of my goals, and that the purpose of having power was to help those less fortunate. I thought that if I could keep her safe, then one day she'd thank me. She'd call me a hero, and she'd love me back. ... But that didn't happen. The Golden Fruit was placed inside of her, and... people got in my way. They tried to stop me. My brother got in my way, and I killed him and knocked him into the river. Kouta, our team leader and my best friend tried to knock sense into me, and I killed him, too. And when I got back from that, I'd found that the man I'd left her with had taken the Golden Fruit out of her, and she was dead.
[He scrubs the back of his hand over his eyes, trying to keep himself from crying. It's not going to help him any. Slowly, painfully, he lifts his head so he can look Rise in the eyes.]
... I'm... I'm sorry, Rise-san. I didn't want to tell you... I... I shouldn't have done any of that, but... I did. I didn't want you to hate me. I didn't want you to think I was a bad person, but I am. And... I'm sorry, for as little as that matters.
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 03:14 am (UTC)Hearing him siding with someone who was clearly a bad guy in her mind was not what she expected. He seemed like he had a much better head on his shoulder than that. Rise crosses her arms on the table, leaning forward to relax. It wasn't any use. There was just so much tension in the air.]
.... Micchy...
[She doesn't know what to really say. He caused death, at his own hand and not. To be so delusional, thinking a girl could love him just because of those things. That if he worked hard, he'd be everyone's here and be loved by all. Selfish to boot. It might sound cruel, but maybe it was better for Mai to have died. She wouldn't have to see Micchy as he was now.
Rise knew she wouldn't want to if she was in that girls shoes.
She bites her lip as she looks at him.]
... you're such a kind person... it's really hard to believe any of this happened, especially that you made those things happen. I... I think if I knew this when we first met, I'd be just as scared as I am now. Maybe even more.
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 03:24 am (UTC)I can't... ask you to forgive me. That weekend where people from home showed up... Kouta showed up, and so did my brother. Kouta forgave me... I think my brother tried to, in his way, though... he blamed himself. But I don't deserve to be forgiven for those kinds of things. When I get home... if by some miracle the world manages to survive... I'll still never be able to make up for what I've done.
[It won't do him any good to try to express how he'd gone mad, or how he'd tried to claw his way back from it. It'd just scare her more.]
I don't expect you to try to continue being my friend. I don't expect you to think that I'm okay to continue talking to. If you never want to speak with me again... I'll miss it, but I have no room to complain about it. I really... do want to become a better person, if I have the chance to. I want to help people rather than hurt them. But... I don't know if I can.
[He smiles a bit sadly, and... no. He can't even pretend that he's not tearing up at this point. His voice is a bit shaky, and it takes him a moment to get the next part out.]
I'm... I'm scared of me, too. I can't guarantee that I won't hurt people again. I haven't hurt anyone here, really, but I might. I'm a dangerous and terrible person, even if I don't want to be. So... it's up to you if you ever want to see me again. You can take as much time to think about it as you want.
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 03:36 am (UTC)This hurt. Much worse than she thought it would. She had never been terrified of a friend before. A little intimidated, like with Kanji, but never to the point where she wanted to run and hide. She moves her hands down to her lap and digs her fingers into the fabric of her skirt. She's got to keep some kind of grip on reality.
The only relief she feels is in not having brought Nanako with her. That would have made everything much, much worse.
She takes a deep breath before forcing herself to look at him.]
I don't... I don't want to stop being friends, but...
[For now she had to rip the band aid off, and heal. Her voice gets smaller when she finished her words.]
I think we should stop talking for a while. So I can... think about all of this. Okay? I don't want to rush a decision... when I'm ready-[if ever]- I'll contact you.
[Rise is on the verge of crying. It takes all of her resolve not to run before he answers her.]
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 05:00 am (UTC)[... It's clear that she needs time, and that him sitting here is just making it worse. He takes another drink of his coffee, before standing up.]
I... thank you, Rise-san.
[For at least a few moments of happiness. For at least a little bit of time together. For not just bolting straight out. He bows to her, a bit lower than he needs to, and then heads towards the counter to pay for both of their drinks.]
no subject
Date: 2015-09-04 05:33 am (UTC)She'll stick to traveling until she can handle this better.
Standing, Rise watches him go. This was not at all what she had expected. She may never be able to look at him again. Time will tell.]